Douglas Adams hailed as a prophet who unintentionally unlocked the secrets of the universe.
Scientists discover the answer to life, the universe and everything really.
The story initially broke in 1996 as Cambridge scientists choked on their cups of tea. Working feverishly for somewhat less time than Deep Thought took, they’d finally cracked the code, and the word was out. The answer to life, the universe… everything really, actually turns out to be …. 101010! Yes, this number decided to go incognito wearing binary code, but any HHGTTG fan automatically reads it in it’s pure bathetic form. Yes, the number you wouldn’t be afraid to introduce to mum and dad turns out to be the Hubble Constant.
To really understand the significance of this breakthrough, we need to travel back to the start of it all, some 15 billion years ago. Yes, that original universal orgy that make Playboy mansion parties appear pedestrian, the Big Bang. This event was so X-Rated that we can only take up the story some 300 000 years after the BB. Suffice to say however, that ever since this initial “Let’s get this universe thing really happening” event, the universe has continued to expand at a constant rate, more or less. The rate at which this happens is called the Hubble Constant. No-one has really examined just how constant he was, but seeing as how he spent most of his nights star-gazing, I’m guessing he was a pretty solid dude. Edwin Hubble was just about ready to add milk to his tea when he noticed something funny about starlight. Fast forward to 1996 and this amazing discovery was reduced to an average constant, 42.
International Bad Poets will be rejoicing across the planet. When speaking to the Vatican’s astronomical spokesperson, who remarked prophetically that his name was not important, Fr Bart Fast responded that “St Douglas’ sanctification would be duly announced once the fuss about some Romanian called Agnes had died down.”